a kiss is not just a kiss

over 46 years on this planet

a good 31 of em spent kissing random dudes, boyfriends… and the occasional woman

still, as long as I’ve enjoyed the art of kissing

with others who’ve likewise had similar stretch of time for years of practice

it never ceases to amaze me

the countless amount of men who do not know how to kiss back.

I’m talking no tongue

none

just pecks

one guy even older than me opened his mouth wide, held the back of my head tight so I couldn’t go anywhere and just moved his face around. with NO tongue. it was like a suction cup because I couldn’t even get my own tongue into what I now recall as kissing into the fucking abyss.

so my question is…

what gives?

because, I don’t get it.

shared my woes with a close guy friend recently and he too has had the same issue with a good amount of women he’s kissed. them not knowing how to use their tongues or not using them at all.

broke it off with the last guy I went on a date due to exactly this.

I lied, of course

he thought it was something he said.

I mean, how can someone say, “no man… you just suck at kissing and you’re way too old for me to teach or take constructive criticism without losing your boner”?

so… the polite and ever elusive, “it’s not you, it’s me” is used once more

aey… it beats ghosting. mostly

but I digress…

a kiss is not just a kiss

a kiss is telling

of what’s to come

of how affectionate the person is

if there’s chemistry

and if he’s even worth seeing again.

kissing is one of my fave forms of expression on the planet

free. exciting. delicious. intoxicating.

sometimes leading to something further when worthy

sometimes not leading to anywhere because all you want is to kiss

and sometimes it’s more than enough because the kiss was not just a kiss... but a what the fuck was that?